<Address>
<Postal Code>
<HP Number>
(10-2-2011)
Department of Biological Sciences
Faculty of Science
National University of Singapore
14 Science Drive 4
Singapore 117543
National University of Singapore
14 Science Drive 4
Singapore 117543
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am graduating from the National University of Singapore with a B.Sc in Life Sciences and would like to pursue my graduate studies in the Department of Biological Sciences of the National University of Singapore. I am aware that there are many research projects carried out by your department and am particularly interested in the research on diseases.
As mentioned in my résumé, my degree specialises in Biomedical Science, which gives me a good foundation in pharmacology, physiology and immunology. My grades also indicate that I am meticulous in my tasks, ensuring that they are free of error and completed on time. Also, my Final Year Project has given me the opportunity to carry out research in a laboratory, equipping me with the necessary skills and techniques. I am confident that these qualities would allow me to contribute greatly to the research scene of your department.
I seek your active consideration of my application for graduate studies in your department. Thank you for your time and I look forward to hearing from you in the near future.
Sincerely,
Kenneth Lee
Draft 2
<Address>
<Postal Code>
<HP Number>
(13-2-2011)
Department of Biological Sciences
Faculty of Science
National University of Singapore
14 Science Drive 4
Singapore 117543
National University of Singapore
14 Science Drive 4
Singapore 117543
Dear Sir/Madam,
I would be graduating from the National University of Singapore with a B.Sc (Hons) in Life Sciences and would like to pursue my graduate studies in the Department of Biological Sciences of the National University of Singapore. I am aware that there are many research projects carried out by your department and am particularly interested in the research on diseases, especially cancer.
As mentioned in my résumé, my degree specialises in Biomedical Science, which gives me a good foundation in pharmacology, physiology and immunology. From my past roles and experiences with Anderson Junior College Symphonic Band and the Singapore Armed Forces Bands, I have gained many skills, like patience gained from the long waits between parade rehearsals and meticulousness gained from the sectionals conducted for my section. Such traits are useful, especially in the field of research. Also, through the Experimental Molecular and Cell Biology module which I took recently, I have been equipped with the necessary skills and techniques in the laboratory, like handling a micropipette, agarose gel electrophoresis, and Real-Time Polymerase Chain Reaction. With these qualities, I am confident that I will be able to contribute greatly to the Department of Biological Sciences in the field of cancer research.
Sincerely,
Kenneth Lee
Hey Kenneth!
ReplyDeleteYour application letter is concise and fairly well-structured.
I do have some points for your consideration:
(1) Grouping similar items together:
In paragraph 2 (As mentioned in my...), you've described your degree, then jumped to your skills, and the back to how your degree is useful. Perhaps you might want to reorder your points such that everything related to your degree comes first and then a subsequent paragraph illustrating your skills learnt in the AJC Band and the SAF Band.
(2) Taking a more concise and objective approach. i've listed an example below:
As mentioned in my résumé, my degree specialises in Biomedical Science, which gives me a good foundation in pharmacology, physiology and immunology. >>> My specialisation in Biomedical Science gives me a good foundation in pharmacology, physiology and immunology.
Otherwise a fantastic application letter!!
Kudos for a walk-in-the-park journey to securing an interview.
Hey Kenneth,
ReplyDeleteI think your 2nd draft is much better then your first. Well done!
Just one quick comment. Maybe you do not need to tell your future employer that you took a module recently. Sounds a little informal.
You could perhaps rephrase it as "I have taken XXX module and as a result have learnt several useful lab techniques, such as..."
Hi Kenneth, I really see the improvement in your second draft of the cover letter. It is definitely more concise and neater.
ReplyDeleteMay I suggest that you elaborate more (about 2-3 sentences) about why you would like to pursue your graduate studies in this field. I believe this impress the person reading this letter.
Another thing to note is that you could move "From my past roles and experiences with Anderson Junior College Symphonic Band...." onto the next paragraph. It would give your reader a clearer view.
Concise!
ReplyDeleteBut could you add a little bit more stuff in? Put more of our lab skills in, instead of just these few? It'll look a little more beefy!